salman ka jadui bracelet
Written by- Aslam
Rating – null
Story Review:
Status: Disqualified(Gay Content)
bikhade hai sach ya sabut.
Written by- Sanki Rajput
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
Review- An investigation of an accident by a police officer who suspects that there is much more than an accident in this case forms the basic story line. The writer has a great vision for this story but unfortunately failed to produce it. The story had great potential to be a good crime psychological thriller but just misses the mark.
Pros- the gripping start, kahani ki shuruwat kahani ko aage padhne ki utsukta banaye rakhti hai, padh ke lagta hai ke aage kuch interesting hone wala hai, the plot seems to be interesting but wasted.
Cons- weak narration and world building; story gets a lot more confusing as it goes by; jaha start gripping tha wahi middle me aakar kya ho raha hai samajh nahi aata; a lot of things needed justification but were not there; you should focus more on sentence building; show, don’t tell. Padhte huye aisa lagta hai ke translate karke likha ho usse padhne ka flow sahi nahi ban pata. Over all, a good read, but isko aur jyada behtar banaya ja sakta tha.
Bhagyashree ka bhagya
Written by- Vegastar
Rating – 7.5/10
Story Review:
Review- The story follows the life journey of Bhagyashree, from her childhood struggles to achieving high ranks in college and while out with her friend getting forcefully married to Krishna. This story is not merely about physical intimacy but about the intricate dance between two souls craving connection. The characters are exquisitely crafted; you can feel connected to Bhagyashree in the beginning, and credit goes to the writer who wrote it with perfection.
Pros- great attention to detail and good emotional touch; gripping start; and a very well-written intimate scene. The writer has provided good attention to detail by mentioning each little thing in the story; the emotional connect is also there, which binds readers to the story; the start of the story till the forceful marriage is crafted well; and the intimate scene has the required sensual touch and is very well written. Great narration and seamless flow in the first half.
Cons: weak middle and rushed ending. The story starts strong but loses its grip in the middle, making it a slow burn after the perfectly paced first half. The sex scene was very well written, but that affected the word limit, which made the ending feel rushed, and some questions remained unanswered, such as what made Krishna change his mind and how Kirshna’s dad easily accepted Bhagyashree, which felt unrealistic. Apart from that, this story was good and worth a read!
प्रेमगीत
Written by- Deeppreeti
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
Review- The story of Dipu and Shoren, two neighbourhood buddies, and their first sexual encounter with each other, where Dipu gets attracted by Shoren and then gets to know that Shoren is also interested in him, and then one event leads to another ending both of them having sex.
Pros: A girl next door is a widely used plotline, and the writer has presented it well; the sex scenes and seduction part are good; the characters are well established in the story; and the narration is okay.
Cons: language feels translated, which directly impacts the story as you totally feel disconnected with the story, and this also impacts the narration by breaking the flow. Due to this, the story lacks the sensual touch, which is a must feature in this tale. I would suggest that if you are not comfortable writing in Hindi, use English. Overall, a good read!
Mami ji
Written by- Aladdin
Rating – 7/10
Story Review:
Review- Horror and comedy are the two genres in the craft of writing that are very hard to master, and the writer has tried a blend of horror and comedy in this story. The story is about Reshma and Manjiri and their Mamiji, who is a ghost.
Pros: The story starts very well, establishing all the characters and their characteristics; the narration is good and easily understandable.
Cons: After a solid start, the story loses its prime focus, moves towards Bakchodi rather than sticking to the plot, and leaves behind a lot of questions, such as who was Mona? Jab Reshma aur manjiri ko mami ke bhoot hone ka pata chalta hai tak tak kahani sahi chalti hai uske baad focus main point se hat ke pandit, sawalo ke ajib jawab aur bakchodi me shift ho jata hai jisse aisa lagta hai comedy jabardasti ghusayi ja rahi hai, isko easily avoid kiya ja sakta tha plot me dam tha but wasted.
Order Order
Written by- Mr. Magnificent
Rating – 8/10
Story Review:
Courtroom drama yadi achche se darshaya gaya ho toh jitna dekhne me maja aata hai, usse kahi jyada maja padhne me aata hai.. Kyunki ek alag hee chaav rahta hai usko padhne me. Writer ne courtroom drama pe based story post karke is usc ki variety ko ek kadam aur upar utha diya hai.
Pros: Story ka presentation bahut badhiya tha.. Sath me jis ease ke sath story pesh ki gayi, wo readers ke liye sanjeevani booti ki tarah tha.. Nahi toh is contest ki kayi shandar kahaniyo me bhi.. Kaun, kya dialogue bol rha hai.. Kiske liye bol rha hai.. Isme padhte waqt kaafi confusion create ho raha tha. Baaki writer ki lekhan shaili bhi lajwab hai, jo readers story padhte hee anubhav karenge.
Cons: Title, choose karne me writer dwara thodi dhilayi barti gayi.. Uspe thoda aur kaam kiya jaa sakta tha aur overall yadi story ka plot aur depth dekhe, toh aise kisse kayi baar hum dekh yaa padh chuke hai.. Crime incidents par thoda aur gehrayi se work kiya jaa sakta tha.
खोटा सिक्का (comedy story)
Written by- Shetan
Rating – 7.5/10
Story Review:
Review- Paise ko liye ek kanjus insan kya kuch nahi kar sakta iska ye kahani me bahut badhiya tarike se hasate huye bataya gaya hai, dhanwan nawab sahab ne 50 paise bachane ke chakkar me kitne to kharch kar diye aur becharo ko jab sukun mila tab pata chale ke fir se thagai ho gayi, kahani purane jamane ki hai aur writer ne ise padhne walo ko wakai us jamane me pahucha diya jab chavvani athanni bhi bahut jyada kimat Rakha karti thi,
Pros- superb narration and flow, kahani aapko bandhe rakhti hai kahi bhi ubau ya jabardasti ki comedy mehsus nahi hoti, ek tough genre me likhna aur usme safalta pana mushkil kaam hai lekin writer ne yaha use bahut acche se kiya hai, kahani aapke chehre par muskan lane me safal hoti hai,
Cons- halki fulki vartani ki trutiya chhod di jaye to kahani me aisa kuch nahi hai jise iski kami batayi jaye, lekhak me kafi pratba hai kewal bhasha par aur pakad majbut karne ki jarurat hai, behtarin kahani.
pyar ki ek kahani
Written by- Roman
Rating – 7/10
Story Review:
Review- Nice and feel good story jo apne title pe ekdum fir baith ti hai aur writer se ise kafi ache tarah se present kiya hai, chahe wo pyar ho ya dosti ho baat karne se hamesha samasya ka samadhan nikal aata hai aur yahi is kahani me writer ne bataya hai and also this story shows a bond of friendship ke apne dost ki takleef me ek dost hi uski madad karta hai jaisa Pramod ne laksh ko sahi raasta dikhaya wahi laksh ki apne pyar se bichadne ki aur fir use paane ki tadap bhi kahani me badhiya tarike se show huyi hai
Pros- the narration was good, writer has justified the plot line, though the plot chosen is not unique still predictable nahi hai, kahani me aage kya hoga uski utsukta bani rehti hai, beech beech jo poetic lines use huyi hai wo kahani ke mood ke sath bahut badhiya tarike se blend karti hai wo use aur behtar banati hai jo ki reader ko bandhe rakhta hai, kahani ka start gripping hai aap laksh ke kirdar se judte chale jate hai jisse kahani ko aage padhne ka interest badhta hai
Cons- kahani bahut jyada fast hai, aur jo resolving moments hone the jinse kahani aur behtar honi thi writer ne wahi jaldbaji kar di, jaha start gripping hai end utna hi hadbadahat me hua feel hota hai, mona aur monty ke sath jo bhi hua use aap detail me bata sakte hai sath hi kahani ke main lead ke bich bahut hi kam moments show huye hai Laksh aur Rashmi se jyada dialogues to Laksh aur Pramod ke beech hai aur ye kahani ke mood par fit nahi hota hai sath hi kahani me bahut jyada spelling mistakes hai jo use dull banati hai, kahani badhiya thi lekin use aur waqt dene ki jarurat thi jisse wo aur behtar ho sakti thi.
ajeeb dastan hai ye
Written by- Jass nav
Rating – 6/10
Story Review:
Review- Mama-bhanji aur brother sister ke sexual relation par based ye story apne title ko puri tarah se justify karti hai, it actually is a ajeeb dastan, the story starts strong, and as the story progresses, the main protagonist gets to know her mother’s and maternal uncle’s sexual relations, and then one thing to another or the main lead’s desire leads to her having sex with her mamaji, Incest kahaniyo me koi bhi sexual relation ekdum achanak nahi banta hai uske liye ek proter buildup chahiye hota hai jo kuch had tak writer ne is kahani me diya hai
Pros- the end twist, there are very few things to talk about in sex stories, but in this case, the writer has tried to add some horror or, let's say, thrill element, which is done perfectly. Kahani end me aate aate ekdum swift trun leti hai jisse reader kuch pal sochne lagta hai ke ye hua kya.
Cons- needs to work on language and spellings; there were a lot of mistakes regarding spellings; jisse padhne ka flow kharab hota hai sath hi story ka pace bahut jyada high hai; end twist badhiya tha, but use aur bhi behtar likha ja sakta hai sath hi Supriya ke maa aur mama ke relation ko bhi aur explore kar sakte the rather than directly showing sex scenes; and this leads to another point: the sensual touch of seduction felt missing; and these points makes this good story just a normal one; overall, a good read!
Dohra fayda
Written by- Rajizexy
Rating – 7/10
Story Review:
Review- Apne title ko ache se justify karti huyi ye kahani 4 kirdaro aur unki apni pyas bujhane ke irdgird ghumti hai, writing a sex story might seems easy lekin aisa hai nahi, usme bhi shemale ke topic ko lekar kahani likhna writer ki kabiliyat ho darshata hai, the story dwells into proper world building and I liked the way how writer described each scene, and provided reasons for each action
Pros- proper world building and character development, is tarah ki stories me world aur character building kafi ahem hota hai taki reader un characters se connect kar paye feel kar paye, the slow seduction and sensual touch makes it more beautiful, the plot chosen was unique and writer as justified it well, narration is good kahi bhi kahani ubau nahi lagti hai
Cons- the pace of the story and constantly changing point of views, kahani bahut jyada speed se aage badhti hai aise me ho rahi ghatnaye kabhi kabhi illogical si feel hoti hai, jaise arjun ka pehli hi mukalat me Savita ki boobs ko touch karna sense hi nahi banata usko aur behtar kiya ja sakta hai, kahani me kayi bar povs change hote hai pehle Savita fir Radhika then third person then again radhika, while kuch story me alag alag point of views dikhana sahi rehta hai story ki demand hota hai yaha waisa nahi hai puri kahani ek pov se likhi ja sakti thi kuch kuch jagah ekdum pov change hota hai jisse flow par fark padta hai, baki sensual scenes bahut badhiya likhe hai, writer has maintained the essense of story well, overall a good read!
ex- studant
Punjabiboyy
Rating – 6.75/10
Story Review:
Review- A story based on a sexual encounter between a teacher and her ex-student, teacher student stories are there from a very long time so this is not a unique concept but the way one writes it makes the story interesting, sex stories me sex scenes to important hoti hi hai sath hi usko interesting banana ke liye kayi sari chize lagti hai mahol create karna hota hai and writer has done it well in this story,
Pros- the gripping start and slow seduction, kahani ka start gripping hai, reason hai ke kyu Aakash apni teacher ki or akarshit hai and unpar line maar raha hai, and eventually teacher falls for it and they did what both of them wanted, kahani ka shuruwat ka flow kafi badhiya tha, har baat aaram se detail ke sath likhi thi jisne readers ko kahani se jode rakha but then…
Cons- weak middle and ending, jaha kahai ki shurtwat damdaar thi wahi kahani bich me aate aate track change kar deti hai, bich me ek jagah pov bhi change hua hai aur wo change dhyan me aata hai jisse kahani ka flow tut ta hai sath hi aapne sex scene dikhane me bhi jaldbaji kari hai, you had the word limit aap use acche se utilise kar sakte the jo is kahani ko aur behtar bana deta.
भूलभुलैया
Written by- Adirshi
Rating – 8.75/10
Story Review:
Review:
Kya kamaal ki story likhi hai Adirshi ne.. Matlab jisne bhi ye story padhi hogi wo romanchit hue bina nahi raha hoga.. A Pure Fantasy tale, mindboggling, fantastic, fabulous :thumbup: yadi writer, admin staff me nahi hote toh awashya hee ye story is contest ki winners story me se ek hoti.. Kyunki ise likha hee aisa gaya hai ki, 10 me se 8 padhne wala ise winners list me shamil kar hee dega.
Pros: Story's uniqueness... विरले hee aisi fantasy tale hume padhne ko milta hai, jisse rom rom romanchit ho uthe.. Story ke title se lekar the end tak.. Ek -ek shabd, mano moti ke maala ki tarah piroya gaya ho. Lekhan shaili, story ka presentation.. Fantasy aspect ko justify karna... Sabkuch lajwab tha.
Cons: puri kahani me waise toh naa ke barabar mistakes thi, par ek -do word thode galat type ho gaye. Baki story yadi thoda aur lambi hoti.. Thoda aur fantasy aspect ka varnan padhne ko milta toh maja 8-10 guna adhik ho jata :D
ctrl+z
Written by- Mak
Rating – 8/10
Story Review:
Review- A well-written sci-fi tale with a catchy title that will have readers wishing they could hit the undo button on reality. The story follows Mohit, who has created a device that can alter reality and undo time for him. a playful sci-fi adventure. The writer has succeeded in creating a great story for sci-fi lovers. With its fast-paced plot, witty dialogue, and imaginative world-building, it is a delightful read for fans of science fiction.
Pros- unique concept, well executed plotline, great flow and narration, realistic and witty dialogues; the story provides a fresh perspective on the theme of time travel or space time, which makes readers more invested in the story; the way Mohit describes his device Akki’s reactions to crucial points after knowing he had done all this for a girl and the strong ending trapping them in the time loop—everything is presented very well; the narration was superb, the story never feels dull or boring, the dialogues used were realistic, which makes readers more interested, and the and the story maintains its pace throughout the end, which is great. The chemistry between Akki and Mohit is shown perfectly.
Cons- There were a few mistakes is spellings and all but that can be ignored. Despite its engaging dialogue and dynamic characters, it feels that the story lacks depth. The world building could have been done in a better way. Throughout the story Mohit kills himself twice-thrice and there lacks the reactions of others, Overall, it was a great read!
Karmon ka fal
Written by- Vajradhikari
Rating – 7/10
Story Review:
Review- An action packed revenge story jo apne title ko ekdum justify karti hai, the story is of dev jo musibato ko paar karte huye apne mata pita ki maut ka badla leta hai aur apne pita dwara apne ko saupe kaam ko pura karta hai, kahani bahut badhiya hai aur isme writer ne bahut saari chize dikhane ki koshish ki hai jisme wo kuch had tak kamiyab bhi huye hai, kahani ek defined pace par chalti hai jaha kya ho raha hai aap bahut had tak samajh jate ho siway kuch jagho ke jaha halka sa confusion banta hai, the selection of plot was good and written with great effort
Pros- gripping start, kahani ka start bahut gripping hai, ladke ka aur uske piche ke gundo ka introduction kahani me ruchi paida karta hai, kahani ka narration third person se first person point of view me writer ne bahut smoothly change kiya hai jo ki story padhne ke flow ko nahi bigadne deta which is actually good.
Cons- way too much loopholes, story has a gripping start but middle me aate huye thodi si ubau hone lagi hai, sath hi koi bhi character sahi se establish nahi ho pata, na to kabile wale aur na hi villains, aur isse plot me bahut loopholes reh jate hai jisse kayi sawal aise hote hai jinka jawab nahi mil pata, sath hi kahani ka end isko weak banata hai, dev yadi jinda rehkar hi kuch aur kadam uthata rather suicide to ending aur better lag sakti thi, there are spelling and grammer mistakes jinpar dhyan dena chahiye tha, is tarah ki kahani me emotional element bhi bahut impact daalta hai jo ki kafi jyada characters ki wajah se yaha weak ho gaya aur koi character sahi se establish na hone se unse connect hi nahi ho paye. Kahani badhiya thi aur bhi badhiya ho sakti thi.
Whisper of fate
Written by- Sanki Rajput
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
A short feelgood romance story based on arranged cum love marriage theme. This is the story of two college buddies who liked each other but never confessed, their family who knows each other well fixes their marriage and then they finally got to know each other’s feelings, nice plotline presented with good narration, the story shows if you love someone the universe conspires to make you together and that’s what shown in the story
Pros- Nice plot great use of language and superb narration, the plot chosen was good and title fits the story, the scenic descriptions of mountains and Shimla in the start written beautifully, the writer possesses great vocabulary which is seen in the story, narration was good which makes it more readable.
Cons- way too short and fast, the story’s pace is a biggest -ve point here, romance stories need an emotional connect which was clearly missing in the story you can’t feel the characters, everything happens way too quickly, is kahani ko samay dene ki jarurat thi this could have been a spectacular read but misses the mark.
Chhoti si bhul
Written by- Sultantipu40
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
Review- A nice thriller with a pinch of romance in it. The story filled with patriotic and passionate characters keeps you interested in the narrative. The story follows Rehan and Reshma on their adventures to eradicate crime within the country with the help of other characters, and in parallel, they have their own love story.
Pros- The plot chosen is hard to present in a shorter format as you have a lot of things to convey and a lot of things to justify, so well done on that. The story succeeds in it; the protagonist is engaging with a complex back story, which makes you feel interested in the character; and scenes are described well.
Cons- weak narration; the story has a very weak narration, which makes it a bit confusing; kayi jagah kya ho raha hai samajhna mushkil ho jata hai; while the characters are well written, lekin still wo kahani me sahi se establish nahi ho pate hai; a lot of questions remain unanswered; kahani kafi fast pace se aage badhti hai aise me kuch characters sense hi nahi bana pate; is story me ek strong antagonist ki jarurat thi, but uska end aise dikhaya hai wo koi ho hi na; nevertheless, it was a gripping and entertaining read.
गुलाबो और उसका जवान बेटा भोला
Written by- Rajesh bhagat
Rating – null
Story Review:
Status: Disqualified
dil se dil tak ashish ki Ishita
Written by- No more
Rating – 6/10
Story Review:
Review- A heartwarming story of two childhood sweethearts, Ashish and Ishita, who love each other but never confess due to the fear of society and attempt suicide in order to die together and make their love everlasting.
Pros- Nice feel-good plot and positive ending. While the plot chosen is not unique but has a feel-good essence, the characters feel relatable, like the neighbourhood love story; we can see these stories around us. I liked how the story ended on a happy note, and Ashish and Ishita live happily ever after with each other. Ending it on a suicide point would have made it cliche, so well done on that.
Cons: weak narration, spelling mistakes, and a well-waisted plotline. Aisi kahaniyo me conflict, romance dikhane ke bahut chances hote hai but yaha wo sab miss hota dikha, story ka pace kafi high tha, jisse narration weak ho gaya, kam dialogues hone ki wajah se characters se connect nahi ho pata hai aise me unke suicide ki wajah wagaira sab fail ho jata hai, the plot had potential but was wasted, there were spelling and grammar mistakes, great attempt, it could have been better if given proper time and treatment.
Adhure prem ki dastan
Written by- Alpha werewolf
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
Review- Jindagi se hare huye aise bande ki kahani jo taumra pyar ke liye tarsa hai, usne jise bhi chaha wo usse dur ho gaya, kahani ko emotional banane ki writer ne bahut badhiya koshish ki hai lekin wo emotions feel nahi kara paye, plot was good but not that much engaging, I will suggest while writing a short story focus on showing whats happening through dialogues rather than telling ke pehle ye hua then ye hua hai
Pros- nice use of word, I liked the wordplay at the end which was the highlight of this story, plot chosen was good and sticks to title
Cons- limited character development, weak narration, kahani itni fast paced hai ke characters ko develop hone ka time hi nahi mila hai, jaisa kahani ka plot tha usme high emotional value required thi jo ki missing lagi, even the main character’s name was also missing, spelling mistakes aur weak narration ne kahani ko thoda dull bana diya tha, apart from this, good story but could have been better.
Kab? Kyo? Kaise?
Written by- TheBlackBlood
Rating – 8.5/10
Story Review:
Review- This fast-paced thriller keeps you guessing until the very end. The author expertly builds suspense, and the twists and turns are well-crafted. The story of a suicide/murder investigation filled with twists and a pinch of horror keeps you on the edge of guessing what is going to happen next. Money is the only thing that matters in today’s time, which is shown brilliantly in the story. The clear and engaging plotline makes the story an enjoyable read.
Pros- well-written characters, especially Inspector Shrikant, witty dialogues, great narration, and amazing world building—these are the key points in this story. The narration was on point, which makes the story enjoyable; the pace of the story is maintained very well, never feeling draggy or boring; the dialogues given to Inspector Shrikant are enjoyable; and the way killers are exposed is good.
Cons- less on the horror element and not well-established side characters. We know that it is a thriller story, but you have tried to add a paranormal angel to it, which was good for the story but somewhat failed to create that impact. The good thing is that it didn’t affect the story that much. The side characters are not that well established, but overall, it was an amazing read!
Rage
Written by- Aagasthya
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
Review- A story filled with anger, love, and betrayal, the story of a man who is devastated to know that his wife is having an affair outside marriage after 5 years of happy married life, betrayed by his wife, filled with anger that man kills both his wife and her lover, and now in disdain self-pity about his own actions, sometimes blind rage can create nuisance and unforgettable action that one night he regrets, and that is exactly what is shown in the story.
Pros- The language and narration were good; there were hardly any spelling or grammatical mistakes, which is good; the narration was on point, which made the story readable.
Cons- weaker character development is a major drawback in this story as the characters are not well established. The protagonist finding out about his wife’s affair and then Sarah telling him that she is going to meet that guy makes no sense, while the writer has tried to show the emotions of rage, anger, and betrayal, but it is a hit and miss. Overall, it was good but could have been better.
Chapter 1: Bekarar Milan**
Written by- JOKER.
Rating –5/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Ek thriller horror story jo kaafi fast paced thi. Story bullet train ki speed se chalti hai jisme sab hota jarur hai lekin kyun hota hai kissi ko nahi pata khud writer ko bhi nahi. Plot kaafi unique or interesting tha aapka aap chaahte toh aap ek behatrin story likh shaktey they isko leke bus thoda time lagana tha but unfortunately ek bahot badhiya plot waste hogaya. Story mein characters limited they, dialogues usase bhi jyada limited they or dialogues forcefully added lag rahe they. Story skip mode mein thi. Writer mei bahot potential hai bus aapko thoda time deke story likhni caahiye you can do great in this genre.
Overall a good plot wasted..
Yeh Baarishein
Written by- Aagasthya
Rating – 7.5/10
Story Review:
Review- Pehla pyar aksar adhura sa reh jata hai jisme kayi baar to premi apne dil ki baat bol hi nahi pata hai lekin pehla pyar dil me apni ek alag hi chhap chhod jata hai ek khubsurat yaad hi tarah hamesha dil ke kisi kone me reh jata hai aur is feeling ko writer ne is kahani me bahut badhiya tarike se dikhaya hai, wo barish wo pehli mulakat fir dosti fir ek bichhdan aur fir dobara kabhi apne us pyar se milne ki chah, from start to end kahani bahut khubsurat hai.
Pros- Great word play and narration, kahani me writer ne barish ko jis tarah shabdo me bayan kiya hai wo khubsurat hai, great word play there, narration bhi on point hai you feel connected to suyesh kabhi na kabhi kahi na kahi sabne suyesh ko jiya hai aur usko kahani me bahut badhiya tarike se bataya gaya hai, us pehle pyar ki feeling ko sahi se kahani me piroya gaya hai
Cons- A lot of spellings and grammatical mistakes jisse kahani ki vibe usko padhne ka thoda flow gadbata hai, kahani ek monologue ki tarah hai lack of dialogues ki wajah se emotions puri tarah feel nahi hote hai, kahani me kya chal raha hai ke likh kar batao through dialogues and scenes, show don’t just tell isse kahani ko aur depth milti hai, overall badhiya kahani thi
Maine Jab Dekha Tha Tujhko
Written by- Aagasthya
Rating – 7/10
Story Review:
Review- Once again pehla pyar aur uske adhure rehne ki ek aur dastan, ek tarfa pyar par adharit ye kahani bas do kirdaro par kendrit hai Rishi aur Siya aur Rishi ka Siya ko apne man ki baat, siya ke liye apni feelings batane ki hai, ek tarfa pyar ki takat hi alag hai aur is line ko writer ne is kahani me ekdum hi sahi se establish kiya hai ke rishi ko bas siya ko apne dil ki baat batani thi aur badle me uski koi chahat nahi thi ke siya bhi uske liye wahi feel kare and this is written beautifully in the story.
Pros- poetic lines, narration, great word play and awesome dialogues are the main plus factors of this story, the song mentioned at the start and at the end is the story is good, it adds some value to the narrative, the poetic lines are the soul of this story and I like it ke is kahani me aapne kuch scenes add kiye hai dialogues likhe hai characters ko establish karne ki badhiya koshish ki hai. The plot chosen is good.
Cons- A lot of grammatical and spelling mistakes, I would suggest ke likhne ke baad post karne se pehle ek baar kahani ko khud padh liya jaye to ye mistakes avoid ho sakti hai, sath hi kahani me dono hi characters utne sahi tarah se establish nahi ho pate hai, unke piche thoda background dala jata to kahani ko aur depth mil sakti thi, overall badhiya kahani hai.
दंश
Written by- Kaala Nag
Rating – 8.25/10
Story Review:
Review- A great story showing how history repeats itself perfectly, Vishwambhar ne jo jo bure karm apni jawani me aur baad me mujrimko ko bachate huye taumra kiye hai uska nyay prakruti ne kis tarah kiya hai ye is kahani me bahut badhiya tarike se bataya gaya hai, karm karte huye insan ko fal ki chinta nahi karni chahiye ye satya hai lekin kuch karm aise hote hai jinhe nahi karna chahiye kyuki uske fal unke parinam unse bhi adhik pidadayi hote hai jo lekhak ne is kahani ke madhyam se bahut acchi tarah se bataya hai, vishwambhar/vivek ne jo dansh diya tha uske jehar ne ant me usi ke pariwar par apna asar chhoda, aapko apne kiye ki saja jarur milti hai aur uske bagair life ka circle complete nahi hota ye baat is kahani ne bakhubi batayi hai.
Pros- language, narration, world building and well-chosen and executed plotline. This fast-paced story keeps you on the edge until very end, the seamless narration makes it an interesting read, language is easy to understand and world building bhi kafi sahi tarike se ki hai, characters are also established well, having a solid start and an engaging end.
Cons- Grammatical mistakes are there in so many sentences which could have been ignored, lack of emotional depth, and limited character depth, while the character of Patnaik is well-developed, character of Divya feel somewhat one-dimensional. Apart from this the story is a must read.
Khoj
Written by- Niks77kill
Rating – 7.5/10
Story Review:
Review- Ek baap ki apni khoyi beti ko dhundhne ki kahani jo jaise jaise aage badhti hai naye khulase hote jate hai, Writer has successfully written a good suspense story here and you will find yourselves involved in the journey of Deepak to find his daughter whom had ran away with her lover, kahani ki theme unique hai aur start se end tak pathako ko apne sath bandhe rakhti hai, writer ne Deepak ki apni beti ko khojne ki jaddhojahat ko kahani me badhiya dikhaya hai ke kaise wo har jagah jakar rajni ko dhundh raha hai lekin wahi kahi kahi kahani me emotions ki kami si bhi dikhti hai aur kahani apne piche kayi sawal ko waise hi chhod jati hai jinka jawab kahani me milna chahiye tha.
Pros- unique plot justified title well narrated story, kahani ka plot writer ne bahut badhiya liya hai aur ise utne hi badhiya tarike se likha bhi hai, ghumshuda beti ki khoj ki mehnat kahani me badhiya show hoti hai, beginning aur middle ekdum clear hai kahani kahi bhi apne motive se hat ti huyi nahi dikhti, sath hi flow badhiya hone se samajhne me bhi aasaan hai, narration on point hai jo aapko bore nahi hone deta.
Cons- Weak ending and limited character depth, kahani ki jaha shuruwat aur middle badhiya hai wahi end me aate aate kahani thodi kamjor si pad jati hai, the story's climax and resolution feel rushed, with loose ends hastily tied up in the final conclusion, leaving some questions unanswered. Agar kahani me rajni ka angle bhi add hota to kahani ko aur depth mil sakti thi, kahani Deepak aur uske rajni ko khojne ki hai aise me rajni bhi ek ahem kirdar hai uske bare me aur likha ja sakta tha uska character bhi behtar ho sakta hai, overall kahani badhiya thi aur behtar ho sakti thi.
Baat Ek Raat Ki.
Written by- Samar_Singh
Rating – 7/10
Story Review:
Overview - Ek typical bollywood type Thriller, suspense and horror themes se bharri story. Story kuch dosto k irrd girrd ghumti hai jinke naam hain Kabeer, Sheetal, Pritam, Nidhi, Vinay aur Meera. But major character iss story mein hai according to me Priya. Priya k role ko bahot he ummda tareeke se dikhaya gaya hai jabki uska current situation mein koi lena dena hai nahi.
Pros:- Plot bahot he common hai as i said typical Bollywood type plot but tumne usko uncommon bananey k liye bahot mehnat ki story short thi or characters bahot jyaada they lekin still sab characters ko bahot he ummda tareeke se manage kiya hai aapne. Priya ki life story ko bahot he ummda tareeke se present mein dikhaya jisase story ne ek naya mode leliya ye ek bahot bada positive point tha .
Cons:- Story mein bahot jyaada jaldbaaji dikhai aapne, kaafi words baaki they aapke pass but aapne unka use nahi kiya kai situations adhurri lagrahi thi jinke uppar or details caahiye thi, Kabir ka woh sapna dekha then hakikat mein aana the Sheetal ko dekhna story ek bahot he romanchit mode pe thi but tab tumne story ka end kardiya, uss driver ko killer dikhaatey hue jo sach hai yaa nahi woh readers k samjhne k Uppar hai but story adhurri lagi. Kuch gruesome scenes hone k baad bhi story ka horror element missing tha situation k hissab se aap ek horror environment create nahi kar paaye story mein.
Overall a good read..
BATTLE FOR THE EARTH
Written by- Black
Rating – 6/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Well title k hissab se main kuch alag he sochke gaya tha lekin ye story kuch or he nikali. Ek superhero story likhne ki koshish ki aapne jisme aap safal bhi hojaate agar first aap characters ko better way mein show kartey and second agar itani khichadi ek sath nahi pakaatey.
Pros:- Well kaafi positive points they iss story k for Starters plot kaafi acha or unique tha and details k uppar aapne kaafi dhyaan diya tha jo saaf dikhai deraha tha jisne iss story ko meri najaron mein kaafi behtar banaaya. Story ka comedy genre thoda boring hotey hue bhi funny tha.
Cons:- As i said earlier story bahot achi ho shakti thi, kaafi flaws they story mein but sabse main jo tha woh tha aapki jaldbaaji bahot jaldbaaji mein story likhi aapne jisase ye laga ki koi essay padh raha hun uske baad story ka narration bahot jyaada weak tha. Conversation bhi properly aapne show nahi ki dialogues aise lag rahe they maano forcefully daale gaye they. Spelling mistakes bhi kaafi thi.
Overall an entertaining story.
Side note:-Try focusing on only the comedy genre next time you can do wonders in that.
Love aur Lust
Written by- KnightAngel
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Ek typical sex story. Story Deep or Kusum ki hai, Deep naya naya Gurugram aata hai or usse apni padosan Kusum passand aajaati hai ab ye uska Pyar hai kusum k liye ya hawas ussi k Uppar ye Kahaani hai.
Pros:- Story ka plot bahot he common tha but aapne usme apna he twist add kiya. Narration bahot he badhiya thi and story ka flow aapne bahot ache se maintain kiya. End mein dikhaya sex scene bhi kaafi ummda tareeke se likha gaya tha..
Cons:- Story aapne shortcut mode mein likhi, thoda characters ka biodata dedetey ache se toh behtar hota. Words bahot baaki they aapke pass maybe time kam hoga but jo bhi tha Deep ka background thoda samjhaate toh story mein interest banta Deep or Tanya ka thoda flashback bhi show karna tha. Then aapne question pucha title mein Love Aur Lust well iska jawaab toh aap khud nahi jaantey kyunki ofcourse aapne Lust toh dikha diya ki kaise Kusum ka jism hai etc and then sex scene bhi daala but love se related koi point tha nahi isme. Dono ka bahaar ghumna, movie dekhna isase koi logic nahi banta love ka, yahan bhi aapne jaldbaaji dikhaai thoda buildup rehna caahiye tha Kusum or Deep k bich thoda Romantic angle daalna tha thodi conversations add karni thi jisase inka jo long awaited sex scene tha woh over the top hojata..
Overall a good read..
DREAM: ONE NIGHT STAND OF A MIDDLE-CLASS HUBBY
Written by- UFAQ_DASAN
Rating – 6/10
Story Review:
Overview :- A very unique story but due to it being written on the fast forward mode the story losts it's uniqueness and became just a typical sex story.
Pros :- Story is of a Hubby Ravi and his wife Rupali. Now a unique story as i said, why unique?? Because normally in stories a husband gets hard watching his wife with others but here it is completely opposite of that. A wife who gets excited seeing her husband with other girls she even arranges females for her husband to have sex with. Good thinking on the plot.
Cons:-Well as i said story is written in fast forward mode, sex scenes are just there, they add no spice to the story. There is 0 dialogues in the whole story which makes it just like any another sex story. The flow of the story is completely missing.
You had an wonderful idea you should've given it some time and thinking. Overall a good story.
गुलाबो और उसका जवान बेटा भोला
Written by- rajesh bhagat
Rating – null
Story Review:
Status: Disqualified
अवसरवादिता
Written by- fountain_pen
Rating – 7.75/10
Story Review:
A beautifully crafted tale of budding romance of Shubham and Nilofer from getting married against will to ultimately accepting each other as life partners with love and respect. from Shubham standing up for his self-respect to Nilofer always being on his side going against her own father the story is crafted very well, for me this title is a bit hit and miss but on some notes it fits well. The adding of political angle provides depth to the story and well woven characters makes the story an interesting read.
Pros- Good narration, well written characters superb use of language, good character development and engaging writing style these are the +ve points of this story, I liked the way how writer handled the interfaith part with such ease without mentioning any religion and respecting diverse faiths this is something which is not seen quite often here. Chemistry between Shubham and Nilofer is well written and you can feel it.
Cons- While the narration is good but is not seamless and the story losses connectivity in the middle, The story has clear beginning which can hook readers but lost the touch in the middle and the ending is felt rushed. There should have been more of Nilima, uska character aur explore ho sakta tha, story jumps to some scenes very fast which makes it a bit confusing, you have a very good command over Hindi and the story is quite good but aur better ho sakti thi.
Lakshy
Written by- rusty blade
Rating – 7/10
Story Review:
Overview :-Well an interesting story, plot bahot he interesting select kiya tha aapne but story ka content kaafi basic tha. Story 4 Major characters k ird gird ghumti hai jo hain Misha And Rajan (Baap Beti) aur Riya and Vijay (Bhai Behan). Dono he situations mein kaafi awkward issues chal rahe hain. Riya Jahaan lesbian hai iss wajah se shaadi nahi karna chaahti jabki Misha apne shaadi k kuch din baad he waapis apne ghar aa gayi kyunki uska pati abusive and rough hai..
Pros:- Jaisa maine kaha plot bahot he interesting select kiya aapne. Then story ko limited characters k sath he likha jisase story mein khichdi nahi bani. Story ko narrate karne ka tareeka bhi kaabil-e-tareef tha kuch jagah aap patri se uttare jarur but aapne manage karliya. Story ka flow bhi aapne start se end takk pakkadke rakha kuch parts ko chhodke..
Cons:- Story plot unique hotey hue bhi story ka content common sa tha, iss plot k hissab se readers kuch extraordinary expect kar rahe they aap se. Dialogues missing they story mein, i know word limit puri horahi thi aapki but still kuch unnecessary parts hataake aap thode dialogues daal shaktey they story mein taaki story mein koi jaan aati, ab story ek essay ki tarah lagi. Sex scenes kaafi awkward or non sensual they aisa lag raha tha maano forcefully daale gaye hon jisase story ki ending kaafi boring lagi.
Overall a Great read.
An Artist
Written by- fountain_pen
Rating – 7.25/10
Story Review:
The story of a decommissioned army officer and An Artist as the title says, the story revolves around Ekam and his journey to become an artist following his passion with efforts of proving his late commanding officer innocent however the central theme revolves around Tulika and Ekam and their romantic journey and the secrets unfolding. The story has quite an interesting premise with the army backdrop and a very good chemistry shown between Ekam and Tulika however the story is a hit and miss despite its well-chosen and unique plot line
pros- Well-chosen plot line, good narration and well written chemistry between Tulika and Ekam, the plot chosen for this story is quite interesting and it can be easily transmitted to a long story as it has so many things to say and show which readers might like to read in detail, the narration was good and story maintain its pace from start to end, the character of Tulika and Ekam are written very well.
cons- Narration was good but not seamless as there were a lot of things happening in this story which makes it confusing, too many characters involved makes it a mess as none of the characters are explored, Major Kunal was among one main characters but not well established, bas uska mention aata hai baki uske baad kuch pata nahi, Ekam decommission hua lekin wo case detail me kya tha pata nahi, ek chote narrative me bahut si bate batane ke chakkar me kisi ek baat ko aap sahi se bata hi nahi paye, I said ke kahani apni pace sahi maintain karti hai lekin still bahut fast hai as kuch lines ko samajhne ke liye reread karna padta hai, it felt ke kisi bahut badi kahani ko kaat chhat kar word limit me fit karke parosa gaya hai jo kahani ko dull bana raha hai, kahani me itne kirdar hai ke aap kisi se connect hi nahi ho pate ho aur jab aisa lagta hai ke ab kahani samajh aa rahi hai tab scene change, Plot me dam hai I would suggest ke ho sakte ke isme long story likhe as readers ko Ekam aur Tulika aur Kunal ko karib se janna jyada accha lagega, overall a decent
Writer
Written by- Hell Strom
Rating – 7.5/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Ek badhiya detective story jisme aapne kai popular cultures ki terms/ characters ko use kiya for example first the famous "Keshav Pandit" By VP Sharma. Second "Sherlock Holmes" and most importantly "The Adventure Of Cardboard Box", toh jab story mein itane famous terms use ki gayi hon toh story se expectations bahot high hoti hain toh same iss story se thi readers ko.
Pros:- Story ek typical detective story thi ek ummda plot k sath. Story ka sabse bada positive point tha ki story mein kuch bhi hua ho story ka suspense aapne tuttne nahi diya jiss wajah se story ne readers ko end takk pakade rakha or readers ko attract kiya. Suspense or thrill ka badhiya dose aapne readers ko diya..
Cons:-Well story ka sabse bada issue tha characters ka khichadi ban jaana jisne story ko befaltu confusing banaya, jaldbaaji bhi aapne bahot dikhaai story mein jisase story ko fast forward mode pe padhna parda. Spelling mistakes bhi kaafi thi jiss wajah se dialogues atpattey lage.
Overall a must read.. Great story..
Mandir ka Rahyaash
Written by- JOKER.
Rating – 6/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Ek interesting story jo bullet train ki speed se chalti hai. Story famous "Kalika Mandir" k ird gird ghumti hai jisse Odisha mein dikhaya gaya hai. Story k main character Dr Sharma hain jo ek archeologist hain or mandir k rahasyon ko suljhana chaahte hain..
Pros:- Well story ka sabse bada positive point tha plot selection aapne plot bahot he ummda select kiya tha and aap isase ek behtarin thriller and suspense se bharpur story likh shaktey they. Story ka Suspense ek or positive point tha..
Cons:- Well as i said earlier, story bullet train ki speed se chalti hai or khatam bhi hojaati hai. Story ki wording k hissab se story ko proper hindi mein hona chahiye tha naa ki Hinglish mein kyunki story mein bahot saari spelling mistakes hain. Then story mein jo horaha hai woh kyun or kaise horaha hai iska koi proper logic kissi bhi chapter mein nahi diya aapne jisase story baseless hogayi..
Overall a brilliant plot wasted due to writers laziness.
A Tale of Romance in the City of Taj
Written by- Euphoria
Rating – 7/10
Story Review:
Overview :- A typical romantic story. Story revolves around the only major characters of the story Meera and Kabir. Meera is an artist and Kabir is a local tour guide in the great city of Agra. They first meet at the Taj Mahal and there is an instant connection between them.
Pros:- A typical short and sweet romantic plot. The narration is wonderful, over the top i must say. Some extraordinary vocab is used in this story which makes it even more beautiful.
Cons:- My issue with the story was it was very short and fast paced. It would've been one of the best stories of this year if you would've given it some more time. The dialogues were missing and dialogues are the most important part of an romantic story.
Overall a beautiful story.
Katputli
Written by- cheekku
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Kahaani 3 major characters k ird gird ghumti hai Raja, Riya or Guruji. Plot romantic hai jisme writer ne black magic ka tadka bhi lagaya hai jo mujhe unnecessary laga. Raja Riya se pyaar karta hai but pyar ka ijhaar nahi kar paata or yahin se story suru hoti hai..
Pros:- Ek behad common plot ko leke aapne ye story likhi jo apne aap mein kaabil-e-tareef hai. Story mein characters limited they or unke dialogues bhi bahot badhiya tarah se distributed they.
Cons:- Story mein bahot kuch aisa hai jo sense nahi banata. First of all Black Magic angle ki koi zaroorat nahi thi story mein koi bhi nahi lekin still aapne add kiya woh angle jisase story mein unnecessary situations create hui. Black Magic angle kyun hai story mein iska bhi koi proper logic story mein nahi diya gaya hai. Ending story ki bahot he simple thi Raja ne Riya ka picha kiya usne Guruji ko dekha usne rod maari woh marr gaya and " i love you " iska koi logic aapne provide nahi kiya..
Overall a good story.
RAAZ
Written by- Black
Rating – 7.5/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Ek typical suspense and thriller story. Story Meera ki hai. Meera ka kidnap hojaata hai or usse kai din bukha pyaasha rakha jaata hai, kidnapper bus usase apna ek Raaz batane k liye bolta hai or ussi Raaz pe ye story likhi gayi hai.
Pros:- First of all this is your fourth story in this contest, wonderful job bahot mehnat ki hai aapne stories mein so thanks for that. Now coming to the story, kaafi unique plot select kiya tha aapne or utani he unique kahaani likhi hai. Kahani ka suspense end takk banaye rakha aapne jo ek bahot he ummda baat hai. Story end takk readers ko apne sath jode rakhti hai.
Cons:- Story ka narration bahot weak tha kai jagah story story ka flow tutta issi wajah se. Kaafi jaldbaaji dikhaai gayi story mein jiss wajah se story apne patri se kai dafa uttari. Spelling mistakes bhi kaafi thi story mein. Aapki sabhi stories mein almost yahi same issues hain you are a great writer just work on these issue.
Overall a must read story.
Internet Wala Love..
Written by- Hunter1920
Rating – 6.5/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Ye story nahi ek reddit post lag raha tha kissi dukhi user ka :D. Bahot he interesting story likhi aapne. Long distance /online Love etc sab topic cover kar liye. Story Riya or apne hero ki hai. Simple c short story hai or mostly inspired hai aajke online world se kyunki aajkal yahi sab hota hai social media websites par.
Pros - A very cute story with a very cute storyline. That's about it.
Cons:-Kaafi short thi story. Details missing thi, dialogues bhi missing they and also spelling mistakes bhi kaafi thi.
Overall a good read.
~ Queen ~
Written by-Damha
Rating – 7.5/10
Story Review:
Overview :- Ek bahot he interesting Suspense thriller story. Waise toh story Sushant or Zara ki hai lekin isme kai Pehlu or major characters hain jaise Mohanlal uski family, Ayush or Nikhil etcetera. Ek multi character story thi ye with an interesting plot.
Pros:- Story ka sabse bada positive point tha aapka plot, kaati unique and original plot select kiya tha aapne. Story detailed thi and simple bhi. Itane characters hone k baad bhi aapne story ki khichdi nahi bananey di jo ek bahot ummda baat hai. Revenge arc ko bhi behtarin tarah de dikhaya aapne.
Cons:- Story ka narration kaafi weak tha jiss wajah ss story ka woh flow nahi bana shake aap jo ye plot deserve karta tha. Story mein kaafi spelling mistakes bhi thi jiss wajah se thoda readers durr hue story se.
Overall a brilliant story.
JAANWAR
Written by- Black
Rating – 7.5/10
Story Review:
Overview :- 5th story in this contest :adore: great job writer sir. Coming to the story ek bahot he dark and emotional story. Story ek rape victim ki hai actually ek nahi 2 rape victims ki hai, pehle Divya and fir Jhanvi. Jhanvi k sath rape kiya Minister k bete or uske doston ne or usko marrne k liye chhod diya unka case Divya ne liya lekin usse force kiya gaya minister k betey ko bachaane k liye tab Viraj samne aata hai jisne Divya k rapist ko saja di thi or ab woh apni beti k rapist ko bhi bahot buri saja deta hai.
Pros:-Story ka plot badhiya tha or ussi plot k according aapne characters select kiye they, characters limited they or unke dialogues bhi ummda tareeke se distribute kiye gaye they koi bhi character forcefully added nahi tha sab plot k according they.
Cons:- Again wahi dikkat aap bahot jaldbaaji kartey hain or bahot kuch skip kar jaatey hai short stories mein ye bahot issues karta hai writer k liye. Spelling mistakes isme baaki stories k muqable kam thi lekin or kam honi chahiye. Best of luck.
Overall a heart touching story.
guys